'Twas Christmas in China

Twas Christmas in China

Twas late in December one cold cloudy day
When out of his bed a boy woke in dismay.
He looked at his calender and saw with a shiver
That Christmas day had already come hither.

He looked outside and said with a sigh
“It appears that Christmas has passed me by.
There are no carols, no snow, no bells,
Not even a sign of jolly Papa Noel.”

In his apartment there hung no mistletoe, no tree
His kitchen was filled with only cheap ramen and tea.
Then out of his bedroom he somberly walked
And slightly to himself he thought,

“How can there be no Christmas in this land?
Santa visits every child with presents in hand.”
But as the boy continued to think for a minute,
He became cold and bitter, a hardened cynic.

“It's this country, that's why!” he exclaimed with a hiss
“It's China, it's Mao, it's those damned communists!”
And as he looked out his window again once more,
Twas but signs in Chinese, a Christmas eyesore.

On the internet he saw with a quiet low sob,
Snowmen and Santa at the top of yahoo.com.
And with sadness and pause he slowly did click,
To see that China's Yahoo had no banner with Saint Nick.

For Christmas in China is no place to be,
With no Santa at all, no wonder they wish to flee.
And out on the street no one seemed to care
That the Christmas spirit was not in the air.

As he stood outside with a dreadful stare,
His neighbor Dave did fly down the stairs.
“Merry Christmas!” the boy did exclaim with a shout,
“Bah humbug” was the reply that came from Dave's mouth.

“Christmas and Santa are not dear to me
This day means nothing, I'm Jewish you see.”
And so the boy's Christmas hopes they were dashed,
“But perhaps we could smoke some holiday hash?”

“No thanks” said the boy with a pitiful sigh.
“How about a holiday dinner, with turkey and pie?”
“No” said Dave “no turkey, no pie on Christmas for me”
“There's Chinese food as far as the eye can see,”

Back to his room the boy went with a fit
He picked up the phone and nearly twenty numbers he hit
"Pick up" he muttered, "at least it's Christmas back home."
But in America all were fast asleep in a different time zone.

“Surely downtown some holiday spirit exists
It's there I must go to find some Christmas.”
So off to the crowded bus, ten cents he did pay
To find some sign of the holiday spirit he prayed

The town was abuzz with people and trade,
But their only concern was the money they made.
No ringing bells were heard, no “Ho! Ho! Ho!” was said
There was no sign of Santa, no reindeer, no sled.

To McDonald's he went to escape the worst cold he could remember
But instead of carols, inside they played “Country Roads” by John Denver.
The McDonald's was void of decorations and cheer,
That establishment of the West forgot that Christmas was dear.

“The church!” He thought as he ate his lonely meal,
“It's there that I will find real Christmas zeal.”
But alas the Cathedral was empty of manger and tree,
The Catholics too had forgotten what Christmas must be.

So off he went alone down the street,
Sulking and walking with his eyes at his feet.
“Christmas's a fraud, a hoax, a sham
There's no Santa at all for sure in this land.”

As the people walked by, “Merry Christmas” he cried
But they just stopped briefly and stared with their eyes.
The traffic went by and theirs horns loudly beeped
Taxi drivers swore at him as he blindly crossed the street.

But then up ahead what was this he did see,
A bright smiley yellow face, looking from a building with glee.
Then there was something that the boy did hear, quietly at first and then with a blare,
“It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas” filled the polluted air.

He rubbed his eyes, and smiled merrily
A super Wal-Mart, “But it truly can't be!”
And the sign proclaimed on a blue and gray wall,
“Everyday Low Prices, Low Prices For All!”

And quickly he went to the main entrance door,
Took a step in and looked in at the store.
And inside were stockings, presents, and a green Christmas tree
The Christmas lights shone as men in suits shopped hurriedly

“Have I found Christmas?” he quietly thought
“At last, the holiday spirit I've sought!”
And out in the aisles there stood Christmas treats,
Hot cocoa and chex mix, next to shrink wrapped pig's feet.

In one corner of the store stood a crowd of Chinese
Watching several TVs showing holiday treats.
And there on the screen sat Santa Clause on his sleigh,
“Maybe it is Christmas after all on this day”.

Then he filled up his basket with holiday cheer
As the sounds of the carols still filled his ear.
Merrily he thought “Christmas in China, it was always here”
And he took from the shelves several bottles of forty cent beer.

A green plastic tree he now carried with him
“No more will my apartment be barren and dim.”
And off to the check out he merrily skipped
To prove to that Christmas had not been gypped.

Outside the exit stood a tree with presents and bows
And outside it was dark and beginning to snow.
Neon lights on the stores glowed green, red, and white
The holiday spirit had at last come on Christmas night.

And in the doorway their stood a man the boy knew
“It can't be, it isn't, can it really be you?”
In his plump red suit and his fluffy white beard
He grinned and winked at a boy's holiday cheer.

From Santa's slanted eyes the boy did glimpse
A sign that even China could not stop Saint Nick.
And as Santa looked at the boy and this magic Christmas night's sight
He said, “Merry Chris-a-mas to all. And to all a good night.”